He would have deserved it, really--and if something had happened to Felix, he would have doubly deserved it--and yet he still can't find it in him to regret coming up the way he did. It's selfish of him, he knows. Like, to risk not just his own life, but his best friend's as well? All because he wouldn't have been able to sleep well not knowing? Because he might not have slept at all, had he learned someone was hurt by his inaction?
But things turned out... fine-ish, so at least the guilt he feels isn't quite so strong. It's only enough to tighten his expression a bit, rather than make it fall completely; his smile twists into something smaller with Felix's words, teetering right on the very edge of apologetic.
"Yeah," he sighs, "yeah... I know." What is this, twice now that he's been given the 'you can't be such an idiot' speech since they got here? Damn. New record. "I'll try to be more careful."
He can't afford to be too reckless here. Not when he'll be dragging the others down right along with him, and not when there's a chance they'll need his help down the line, either. It's hard to adjust his approach so drastically, and he just knows he's gonna screw it up again later, too. So for now he's just gonna go back to staring at those trees (they're very nice trees, very... treelike...) and fall silent again... It's not like he expects anyone to come to his rescue or anything? He can handle himself! Like. Usually...
It's after a short moment pondering that train of thought that he pipes up again with a quiet:
"...Thanks, by the way." He glances down with a nudge of his own, bumping their arms together much more gently than Felix had. "For coming."
As if it even needs clarification. "For saving my stupid ass," is what he should say, but he's pretty sure Felix can supplement that much himself.
[I'll try, Sylvain says, and Felix knows that he means it... as much as he can. Oh, he'll certainly make an attempt to be more thoughtful! He'll remember this conversation, just as he remembers the many others before it, and he'll do his best to be careful—until others are in danger, that is. Until another situation like this one pops up, because Sylvain is... Sylvain. A reckless fool who always—always—comes through when it counts, and Felix hates that about him.
(Felix appreciates that about him.)
So Sylvain thanking him is... pointless, really. "Thanks for saving my ass!" is a thing that should be said, like, as little as possible, because it's the sort of thing that implies the speaker will try very, very hard to avoid repeating their mistake(s) in the future; Sylvain, however, will make this particular mistake time and time again, and they both know this, and while Felix feels that familiar frustration bubbling back up—hmm. He's here now, you know? Keeping his arm close to Felix's like he thinks Felix will neither notice nor care, and Felix breathes out a short, sharp breath before looking back at him.]
I'm not doing it again, [is what he says, voice stern—and this, too, is something they both know? Something they both know is a patent lie, because Felix will come to Sylvain's aid as many times as he's able. Someone has to make sure that Sylvain doesn't die an unfortunately early death.
But there's knowing something, and there's verbalizing it, so! So. Felix studies his friend's face for a moment longer, taking in that small smile and those familiar brown eyes, before he shifts his gaze back up to the treeline. Look at that sunrise! Bright, beautiful colors... a sight for sore eyes, after a night spent fighting stupid skeletons...
And you know, it's just so distracting that he's just going to? Leave his arm right where it is? Barely brushing against Sylvain's.]
Go back. Before the boar notices you're gone.
[Maybe? Probably. He should have already noticed such a thing, if he's worth anything at all.]
That's really as good as a 'you're welcome', isn't it? Or it's as good as he'll get from Felix, anyway, but he's gotten pretty good at understanding these Felixisms over the years... It's kind of like a second, silent language of hidden meanings beneath every jab or insult, a dozen things left unsaid for each one spoken aloud. He likes to think he's more fluent in it than anyone, save for Felix himself--Dimitri might be a close contender, if only 1. Felix were a more willing teacher, and 2. Dimitri hadn't skipped the homework for years on end. It's... fine though?? Like, they're both idiots, but they're his idiots; he's gotten comfortable enough with things the way they are.
In any case, Sylvain's eye lingers even after Felix has turned away again. It's really just long enough for him to reminisce a bit (the memories are bittersweet, but he's tired, and he can't bring himself to get lost in some mindless daydream) before he's glancing back out and keeping his mouth decidedly shut as far as Felix's small allowance.
...It's nice, even if it's actually pretty bittersweet, too. He could break the silence by pointing out how beautiful the sunrise is, though given how the brightening sky acts as a signal for their inevitable departure, he's sure the compliment would taste just as empty as any other he might give: honest, perhaps, but strikingly insincere. They've been apart before, and for longer as well... however, with the others around? And the knowledge that he's here, just not with them? It makes his absence that much more obvious. So, y'know... maybe it isn't just aching muscles that keep him from pushing himself to his feet.
And of course, as if on cue, Felix puts voice to the thoughts he'd rather ignore for just a while longer. He expects this from him, and yet...
"I'm sure he's got plenty to keep him busy, without keeping tabs on all of us... me, especially. I mean, it's not like this is the first time I've stayed out all night."
Although it was definitely a contender for the WORST, comparatively speaking.
"You think he'll be upset?" Maybe if they just... don't tell anyone else about the whole 'endless skeleton army' thing...
[Sylvain's philandering is just, like, a fact of life at this point, and yet? And yet. Thinking about Sylvain running from bed to bed in this world is particularly grating, because seriously, Sylvain, there are other things to focus on! More important things! Would it kill him to take things seriously for once...
...Except that isn't entirely fair, which is why Felix merely frowns up at the sky as he considers how, exactly, Dimitri would react to Sylvain's absence. He's probably off fighting his own fight(s)? With Mercedes and Ashe alongside him, hopefully, but when it comes to Sylvain—well. It's been Felix, Sylvain, and Ingrid for quite some time now. They're supposed to look out for one another, aren't they? They're used to this arrangement, thanks to the five years they spent fighting for Faerghus' future, but with Ingrid missing and the two remaining friends in opposite factions—
Ah. You know what? He's not going to think about that. He's too tired, thanks, so accept this oh-so quiet snort of disdain.]
He'll think coming alone was a stupid thing for you to do. [Maybe. If he has any sense left, that is, but.] For once, I don't disagree.
[And you know it's serious if he, like, openly admits that he'll agree with Dimitri on something. Wild! Take this to heart—especially once Felix bumps his arm back against Sylvain's before adding:]
Stay together.
[A touch quieter than anything he's said before? A touch more... open.]
The real question here should be whether it'll be worse if or when they find out that getting too close to the city itself is Literally a death sentence, but at least Sylvain isn't reckless enough to not keep that particular warning in mind. Alone or not, the fact remains that coming out this far at all was a pretty risky move... Still not one he regrets, necessarily, but the more time passes and the clearer his mind gets (as clear as it can be after an exhaustive night like that), the more he finds himself appreciating the peace they've been afforded now. He'll live to make stupider decisions another day...!
But he does take Felix's words to heart. Of course he does--even if there is the faintest glint of humor in his eye as he bites back the, "See, you two are just alike," that he's certain would turn that bump into more of a jab. He's a master at putting his foot in his mouth, but listen?? It's not worth it, right now.
"You're one to talk," he teases, but rather than accusatory, he sounds almost... fond, if perhaps a bit weary, as if he's already resigned himself to the fact that Felix will be Felix, just as Felix has that Sylvain will be Sylvain. Plus, it's not like he's going to hold the whole 'different factions' thing against him--not when he's still confident he'd be with the rest of them in a heartbeat, if it were only that easy. "You came out alone, too."
Mr. LONE WOLF over here...
"Then again, you always were the one who tagged along whenever I did something especially stupid... You'd think we would've learned by now." He can't imagine dragging Dimitri into half of the shit he's done, and he's sure Ashe or Mercedes would be strongly opposed to, like, 98% of his ideas. Felix might be opposed, too, but he's at least willing to see them through most of the time. "But, I can't say I have any other plans to split off from the others, for the time being... You should stick with Marianne, too."
She's reliable!! And sweet!! And if he can't be there, then he'd at least like to know Felix has someone he can rely on, too...
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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But things turned out... fine-ish, so at least the guilt he feels isn't quite so strong. It's only enough to tighten his expression a bit, rather than make it fall completely; his smile twists into something smaller with Felix's words, teetering right on the very edge of apologetic.
"Yeah," he sighs, "yeah... I know." What is this, twice now that he's been given the 'you can't be such an idiot' speech since they got here? Damn. New record. "I'll try to be more careful."
He can't afford to be too reckless here. Not when he'll be dragging the others down right along with him, and not when there's a chance they'll need his help down the line, either. It's hard to adjust his approach so drastically, and he just knows he's gonna screw it up again later, too. So for now he's just gonna go back to staring at those trees (they're very nice trees, very... treelike...) and fall silent again... It's not like he expects anyone to come to his rescue or anything? He can handle himself! Like. Usually...
It's after a short moment pondering that train of thought that he pipes up again with a quiet:
"...Thanks, by the way." He glances down with a nudge of his own, bumping their arms together much more gently than Felix had. "For coming."
As if it even needs clarification. "For saving my stupid ass," is what he should say, but he's pretty sure Felix can supplement that much himself.
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(Felix appreciates that about him.)
So Sylvain thanking him is... pointless, really. "Thanks for saving my ass!" is a thing that should be said, like, as little as possible, because it's the sort of thing that implies the speaker will try very, very hard to avoid repeating their mistake(s) in the future; Sylvain, however, will make this particular mistake time and time again, and they both know this, and while Felix feels that familiar frustration bubbling back up—hmm. He's here now, you know? Keeping his arm close to Felix's like he thinks Felix will neither notice nor care, and Felix breathes out a short, sharp breath before looking back at him.]
I'm not doing it again, [is what he says, voice stern—and this, too, is something they both know? Something they both know is a patent lie, because Felix will come to Sylvain's aid as many times as he's able. Someone has to make sure that Sylvain doesn't die an unfortunately early death.
But there's knowing something, and there's verbalizing it, so! So. Felix studies his friend's face for a moment longer, taking in that small smile and those familiar brown eyes, before he shifts his gaze back up to the treeline. Look at that sunrise! Bright, beautiful colors... a sight for sore eyes, after a night spent fighting stupid skeletons...
And you know, it's just so distracting that he's just going to? Leave his arm right where it is? Barely brushing against Sylvain's.]
Go back. Before the boar notices you're gone.
[Maybe? Probably. He should have already noticed such a thing, if he's worth anything at all.]
no subject
In any case, Sylvain's eye lingers even after Felix has turned away again. It's really just long enough for him to reminisce a bit (the memories are bittersweet, but he's tired, and he can't bring himself to get lost in some mindless daydream) before he's glancing back out and keeping his mouth decidedly shut as far as Felix's small allowance.
...It's nice, even if it's actually pretty bittersweet, too. He could break the silence by pointing out how beautiful the sunrise is, though given how the brightening sky acts as a signal for their inevitable departure, he's sure the compliment would taste just as empty as any other he might give: honest, perhaps, but strikingly insincere. They've been apart before, and for longer as well... however, with the others around? And the knowledge that he's here, just not with them? It makes his absence that much more obvious. So, y'know... maybe it isn't just aching muscles that keep him from pushing himself to his feet.
And of course, as if on cue, Felix puts voice to the thoughts he'd rather ignore for just a while longer. He expects this from him, and yet...
"I'm sure he's got plenty to keep him busy, without keeping tabs on all of us... me, especially. I mean, it's not like this is the first time I've stayed out all night."
Although it was definitely a contender for the WORST, comparatively speaking.
"You think he'll be upset?" Maybe if they just... don't tell anyone else about the whole 'endless skeleton army' thing...
no subject
...Except that isn't entirely fair, which is why Felix merely frowns up at the sky as he considers how, exactly, Dimitri would react to Sylvain's absence. He's probably off fighting his own fight(s)? With Mercedes and Ashe alongside him, hopefully, but when it comes to Sylvain—well. It's been Felix, Sylvain, and Ingrid for quite some time now. They're supposed to look out for one another, aren't they? They're used to this arrangement, thanks to the five years they spent fighting for Faerghus' future, but with Ingrid missing and the two remaining friends in opposite factions—
Ah. You know what? He's not going to think about that. He's too tired, thanks, so accept this oh-so quiet snort of disdain.]
He'll think coming alone was a stupid thing for you to do. [Maybe. If he has any sense left, that is, but.] For once, I don't disagree.
[And you know it's serious if he, like, openly admits that he'll agree with Dimitri on something. Wild! Take this to heart—especially once Felix bumps his arm back against Sylvain's before adding:]
Stay together.
[A touch quieter than anything he's said before? A touch more... open.]
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But he does take Felix's words to heart. Of course he does--even if there is the faintest glint of humor in his eye as he bites back the, "See, you two are just alike," that he's certain would turn that bump into more of a jab. He's a master at putting his foot in his mouth, but listen?? It's not worth it, right now.
"You're one to talk," he teases, but rather than accusatory, he sounds almost... fond, if perhaps a bit weary, as if he's already resigned himself to the fact that Felix will be Felix, just as Felix has that Sylvain will be Sylvain. Plus, it's not like he's going to hold the whole 'different factions' thing against him--not when he's still confident he'd be with the rest of them in a heartbeat, if it were only that easy. "You came out alone, too."
Mr. LONE WOLF over here...
"Then again, you always were the one who tagged along whenever I did something especially stupid... You'd think we would've learned by now." He can't imagine dragging Dimitri into half of the shit he's done, and he's sure Ashe or Mercedes would be strongly opposed to, like, 98% of his ideas. Felix might be opposed, too, but he's at least willing to see them through most of the time. "But, I can't say I have any other plans to split off from the others, for the time being... You should stick with Marianne, too."
She's reliable!! And sweet!! And if he can't be there, then he'd at least like to know Felix has someone he can rely on, too...